Q:   What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A:   Gifted!
                 
Q:   How do blonde brain cells die?
A:   Alone.
                 
Q:   What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A:   Pregnant.
                 
Q:   How do you brainwash a blonde?
A:   Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
                 
Q:   What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
A:   Artificial intelligence.
                 
Q:   How does a blonde part their hair?
A1:  (Action of scissoring legs apart)
A2:  By doing the splits.
                 
Q:   Why aren't blonde’s good cattle herders?
A:    Because they can't even keep two calves together!
                 
Q:   What did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg?
A:    Nothing.  They've never met.
                 
Q:   Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A:    Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
                 
Q:   When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A:    After a dye job.
                 
Q:   Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?
A1:  She'd just dyed her hair.
A2:  She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown
       around too much.
                 
Q:   Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A:   To catch everything that goes over their heads.
                 
Q:   Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A:    You can park in the handicap zone.
                 
Q:   What was the blonde psychic's greatest achievement?
A:    An IN-body experience!
                 
Q:   Why is a blonde like a turtle?
A:    They both get fucked up when they're on their back.
                 
Q:   What do Darren Millane (Collingwood footballer killed in a
       recent car crash) and a blonde have in common?
A:    Put either of 'em in a car and they're fucked.
                 
Q:   What's a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?
A:    Hump me Dump me.

Q:   How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
A:   Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Q:   How do you get a blonde's eyes to twinkle?
A:   Shine a torch in her ears.

Q:   Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks?
A:    It takes too long to retrain them.

Q:   How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?
A:   There's whiteout on the screen.

Q:   How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer?
A:   There's writing on the whiteout.

Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
A:   You only have to punch information into a computer once.

Q:   What do a blonde and your computer have in common?
A:    You don't know how much either of them mean to you until they go down on you.

Q:   What did the blonde think of the new computer?
A:    She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9.

Q:   Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
A:    (With a rocking of the head from side to side) I dunno!